Our War
by MadameDegrassi96
Summary: Clare meets Eli, yada yada, abusive stepdad, depressed mother, oblivious bestfriend, enemys are back for more, who will help little Clare have hope? maybe a certain Hearse Driver? R&R suck at summeries.
1. Chapter 1

_**OUR WAR. CHAPTER ONE**_

CLARE POV

I was walking up the stairs to my school, all of the memories from this morning fresh in my mind.

Smack.  
Slap.  
Punch.  
Kick.  
Push.  
Pull.  
Spit.  
Plunge.  
Yell.

And then doing it again.

"Clare, I think you should just go to the party with me! Your mom won't mind!" I sighed, yes, yes she would mind.

"Alli, how many times have I told you, I cannot go? I have a lot of stuff to do with my mom, and that's that."

"Fine, but I feel like you just don't want to go. Is, Clare! Watch out!" I was going to question what she had said, when I felt my shoulder push, hard into another, sending my books flying to the floor. My shoulder was in so much pain, but that wasn't due to the bumping it, it was due to the fact that it was bruised beyond normal, all purple and black.

"shit." I picked up my books, and the papers. I felt someone looking at me, I looked up expecting it to be Alli, but it wasn't, it was a boy. He looked quite attractive. He had blue eyes, and he wore plaid. His teeth were really white, and that's when I realized he was smiling at me. I smiled a little at him. He handed me a book, and I gladly accepted it.

"Hey, I'm Drew Torres." I nodded, and grabbed the book; I walked over to Alli, only to see that she was already by this Drew guy.

"So, you're new. Would you like to eat lunch with us? Oh! I'm Alli!" I rolled my eyes. I guess I would be sitting in the library today.

"Clare afterwards we can show Drew around!" I guess not.

"sure, why not?" she jumped all excited, at least she was happy.

"So you mind if I bring a couple people? My brother, and his friend?" she shook her head no, clearly I had no say in this.

My shoulder was still throbbing with pain, but I couldn't do anything about it. I was walking to my class, annoyed of today's lunch plans.

"Clare Edwards, please report to the principal's office." I sighed, what did Clark want?

"Hi sir." His jaw was tight, just like it was this morning.

"I just wanted to make sure you know that you have to come _right_ home after school. Your mother and I have some things to discuss." I nodded.

"Yes sir." He moved his hand to my shoulder, and I mindlessly flinched from that act. He glared at me, and rested his hand on my shoulder, but squeezed really hard onto it, where it was bruised, and bumped.

He did these things to inflict pain, without people knowing it. I began to walk out of the office; my hands were shaking, so I folded my hands around my books, hoping it would help. It wouldn't.

I sat in class, trying to relax my hands, they wouldn't stop shaking, I was writing my paper, and the words were hard to write even one word. I was practically ignoring everything, until I heard my name being called.

"Clare, did you hear me?" I looked up to the teacher, Ms. Dawes.

"Sorry, no."

"Oh, well I said that you will be partnering with Ms. Middleton, and Mr. Goldsworthy." I swear my eye twitched. I have no idea, who this Goldsworthy person was, but _Jenna?_ Why, God, why?

"Clare bears! We're partners!" I stayed quiet, and tried to steady my hands. Nothing was working. It didn't hurt; it just kept shaking, not violently, just a little, like a twitching.

"Clare, so what time should we go to your house?" I wasn't sure what they were talking about, but I had to stop it.

"You cannot come to my house Jenna." She rolled her eyes. I finally looked to the boy, it was mesmerizing.

He had brown hair, it went in bangs around his eyes, his eyes were this dark green color, that you could easily miss, but once you notice it, it's forever etched into your mind. His lips had a very cutting look to them. They were full, and curved, but not round. Very inviting. His jaw line was amazingly good, and I finally stopped looking, when I realized Jenna was talking again.

"So, your names Eli?" I rolled my eyes. She is so stupid.

"Yup." he said simply. I was mostly paying attention to my hand. I quickly got up, and asked Ms. Dawes if I could go to the bathroom, when she said yes, I grabbed my stuff, and rushed to the bathroom.

I sat in the stall, and shook violently, through out my whole body.

.

.

.

"_Clare, get down here NOW!" I slowly made my way down stairs afraid of what would happen. Clark would beat me in front of my mom and she would say nothing. She was so depressed after her and my dad broke up, that she took a random man in with open arms. _

"_Yes, Sir." I said, once I was down the stairs. _

_He grabbed me by my hair, and shoved me onto my knees. _

"_You need serious punishment. I look in the fridge, and there's no milk. Why isn't there any milk Clare?" I gulped._

"_I had the rest with my cereal sir." She took his hand, and back handed my cheek. _

"_How many times do I have to tell you, you don't need food, your fat enough as it is! Why do you eat so constantly!" I hung my head in shame, and that's when it started. _

_He kicked my stomach, and threw my to the floor by my hair, my shoulder rammed into the wooden table, and my back hit the legs. Next he punched and kicked more violently into my legs, and stomach, until I went numb. _

_._

_._

_._

I was so deep in thought I hardly heard the bell ring, but when I did, I knew it was time for lunch.

I walked into the lunch room, looking around, until I felt an arm grab my arm. It hurt, but I looked and saw it was Alli pulling me to a table.

We sat down, and I pulled out a book, to distract myself, from the people eating. My hands were still a little shaky, probably due to my lack of food, but I ignored it. I heard chairs on this table being dragged out, so it must be the people that Alli invited over to our table. I heard words, and sounds but I ignored it, until my book was pulled out of my hands. Instinctively I flinched.

"Clare, why can't you just talk to people? You've been acting weird all year, and frankly it's getting old." She whispered loudly in my ear. I scoffed, grabbed my book, and went to the library. I sat in the back of the library, hiding behind books, tears weren't coming down, because I have an emotional block it seems.

I was reading my book, when I felt someone watching me. Great,

"Jenna what do you want?" I asked harshly.

"I just want to know if you know that Eli kids number." I shook my head.

"I don't even know him; if you want his number ask him yourself." I harshly got up, and walked away, knowing the bell was about to ring.

I was walking when I ran into someone yet again, only this time I felt a scorching pain, in my shoulder. I felt my cut was ripped open, and my sweater was pulled down a little revealing my large black bruise, I quickly yanked it up. I then saw my white cardigan, began to stain red.

"Are you okay?" I looked up to see the green eyed boy, named Eli.

"Yea, I'm fine." I pulled out my cell phone, and ran to the front of the school, and sat at a bench.

"Mom, I need you to pick me up!"

"Why is that Clare?" she asked sharply.

"People will find out, we don't want that do we?"

"Um, I will be there in a minute. Clark will be disappointed that you let this happen." I shuddered at the thought of what might happen,

"Shit, Clare just walk home, my car is gone, Clark took it again." I sighed.

"Okay mom, I'll see you in a bit." My voice broke at the end.

This would be the first time I cried, knowing my own mom, didn't even realize how much I was hurting.

I began to get up, hoping no one would notice me, and I was walking down the road to my house, when suddenly my leg gave out.

I sat on the grass, of this abandoned street, waiting for Gods smites to stop already.

Does God really care enough, to just put a little bit of happiness in my life?

"Hey, need a ride?"


	2. Chapter 2

GENERAL POV

Sometimes, things got carried away, and all he craved, were the hollowed, pained, screams, and bellows that Clare made, as he hit her harder than usual. Sometimes, he couldn't help himself. He loved the welts, bruises, and scars. Emotional and physical. She would never forget who told who what to do. She would never forget the aggression each hit held behind it, like beating her was his daily release, like she was his punching bag.

What's worse? Clare always blamed herself. Of course, she knew she didn't deserve it, but she couldn't help but think that it wasn't his fault. She couldn't help but think that, it wasn't god who was punishing her, because god cannot control people. He can only hope that people were always good seeds. It wasn't god who told Clark to always beat on her. If there was anyone to blame, it was her. No, she didn't deserve it, but it was indeed her fault. She pushes his off the edge. At least, that's what Clare thinks.

In reality, its Clarks fault. Yes, he does enjoy the things he does to Clare, to hurt her the way he does, but it doesn't make it right! It makes it so much worse. It makes him a complete lunatic.

Only Clare won't tell, god knows Helen won't tell, and Clark? Why would he care? The only person that could help Clare is Clare. You cannot help those who don't want your help.

But that didn't mean people wouldn't try. Try to save the abandoned girl from her dragon, to be the knight and shining armor, the beauty to her world, to brighten it up anyway possible. He wouldn't let anyone hurt Clare on his watch. But did he know what was going on, when he wasn't around? No he didn't.

Did he even know anything about her? No, he surely didn't. Did he know her for long? He didn't know her period, other than he wanted to help this broken girl.

"Hey, want a ride?" he was hoping that she would say yes. He wanted to know every portion of this girl inside and out, could he tell you why? Never, because frankly, he wasn't sure of the answer himself.

"No, thanks." She said simply, truth was, she wanted to throw herself into the strangers car and tell him all her problems and hope he could save her from this doom. But she knew she couldn't.

"Nonsense. Let me at least take you home!" he smirked, at her playful glare. But what they didn't know, what that on the inside, there hearts were simultaneously beating to the wind.

"No offense, but I don't even know you. I've seen you a total of ONE times in my life, am I supposed to base my trust on that?" Eli loved her fiery spirit, and she felt so great, to just tell someone off, even if it was totally false information. Clare had seen him twice. Once when she bumped into him on the way out of school, and in English, but mentioning that, would make her seem like she cared.

"Okay, to be honest, I have seen you three times. Nice way to keep up." He said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Clare was confused. What? Three times?

"Um, I am pretty sure it was just once." Clare knew it was twice, but three times?

"I bumped into you, saw you in English, AND you and your friend invited me to sit with you at lunch." He smirked, knowingly at the girl's baffled expression.

"Fine, I will let you drive me home on ONE condition!" he thought she was being playful. While in actuality, she was being dead serious.

"You have to promise me something." He was shocked. That wasn't what he had been expecting. She on the other hand, was still weary.

"You can't ask questions." He nodded, unsure of what the girl meant, but if she was letting him drive her home, he'd agree to anything.

Clare knew, letting anyone near her home was a mistake. She knew, she would get into massive trouble for it. But for some reason, she didn't mind so much, as long as she was with him.

They pulled up to her house, and she went to get out before he could say anything. Her shoulder was still bloody, and her white sweater wasn't helping in the slightest, try to hide it. But, as he said he wouldn't, he didn't ask questions.

She hopped out of the car, to be greeted by an angry Clark.

"And where the _hell_ have you been?" she was too scared to talk, so she just hung her head in shame.

Eli watched, wondering why he was so angry.

Clare, said nothing, but walked into her house. What was going to happen? she was not sure, but she knew she would have more bruises to hide tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

**Marleyismyhoney****-** Yes, Mashed Potatoes are the shit! I am so glad you feel that way! Go to your messages! I SENT YOU SO MANY! Haha.

**Infectiousecho****- **AW! Thanks

**EliandClareForever17**- C:

**lovingyou333****- **I love how excited you get when I update XD!

**KissMeOnTheSideWalk- **Here, I am! GIVING YOU HAPPINESS!

**courtney-renaee****- **No, it has a while left before it's done. Not sure when though 3

I walked into my house, afraid of what would happen. I knew Clark was pissed, but I don't ever get away scotch free.

I prayed in my head, that he was in a good mood today, but as soon as I sat down I knew he wasn't.

The way he balanced his hands in tight fists.

The way his eyes held the fury and death, slowly but surely sinking into me. I swear the Jaws of Life couldn't tear his eyes away from mine.

The way his foot slowly swayed from left to right, the way his jaw was locked, like a rusted tin. The way that his back was pin straight, and ready to spring.

I prepared my mind for the worst.

He walked towards me with his fists stiff at his side. I gulped back my tears and clenched my eyes shut. He took my hands away from my body, and threw me against the wall, and slowly turned around, only I knew this was just the beginning.

He then quickly took his hand and back handed my face hard enough to give me whip lash. I cupped my face hoping to ease the pain, but he wasn't having any of that, and back handed me again on the other cheek.

"Do you think you can just invite people over huh? What were you thinking?" I swallowed so my voice came out strong.

"I wasn't. I'm sorry."

"YOU'RE SORRY? YOU HEAR THAT SHE'S SORRRY?"

I tried my hardest not to cry, but a few tears fall down my face anyway. He brought his hand to the back of my head, and pushed me to the floor, I tried to follow easily so the impact wouldn't hurt as bad, but it hurts all the worst.

He kicked my stomach, and I felt it to the bone. He did it again in the same spot. I felt as though I was going to fall apart, literally. He pulled me up, and tossed me against the stairs, and started yelling unintelligible words. I just counted down the seconds until it was over.

He pushed me into my bedroom,

"I don't want to see your disappointing face for the rest of the night, I better not hear anything." I nodded, and went to the bathroom.

I lifted up my shirt, and saw two fresh bruises on my breast already forming. My stomach was purple and red, but that red would be blue by tomorrow. I looked further down my body and saw all the old marks replaced. I sighed, and took off the remaining of my clothes, and got in the shower.

The water was so hot, and at first my body ached all over. I thought about my dad, and how much I miss him, and how much better he is for me. I couldn't help but think of what he would say if I told him that Clark has been abusing me, and mom just let him, I wonder if he would agree that I deserved this too, or if he would rescue me. I couldn't help but cry, because I miss my dad so damn much.

I was so used to the pain washing my body caused, but it didn't mean that it hurt any less. I winced at every swerve of the washcloth.

That night I dreamed a normal dream, compared to my latest ones. I was lying in the grass, and my skin was so milk smooth, and clean of scratches and bruises. Clear of frustrated skin, and make up breakouts. The only awkward thing was that Eli was there. Yea, Eli the guy I just met, who got me this beating. He was smiling down at me, and that's when I woke up. To say that I didn't understand why I dreamt of him was a severe understatement.

I walked to school in a daze, because I was trying to block the pain I felt with every step. I went to my locker, and twisted the lock in sync with the combo. I pulled out my book, which took extra effort, considering my weak state. It was even harder to pretend that nothing hurt at all.

"Clare!" I turned to see Alli. She bombarded me with a hug, and it was so horrid, but if I can keep from yelling out while getting beat, I can take the deprecations of it.

"Alli, I'd appreciate it if you'd let go." I said as nicely as I could. She let go, and gave me a funny look. I rolled my eyes mentally, and she went into this deep story about how awesome Drew is, and how wonderful her life is turning out. Instead of pretending to listen further, I went off on her.

"Alli, can you stop telling me how wonderful your life is long enough for you to see it isn't what its cracked up to be!" and then I stormed off.

I walked into English, and sat down in the far back, hoping and praying that no one would notice. But in the back of my mind, I knew that I was pushing everyone away, so that I didn't accidently beg them to save me from my life.


	4. Chapter 4

Ms. Dawes was sitting there, talking, and talking, but I couldn't hear her voice over my own heartbeat, and my eyes were glued to my desk. My hands were tightly engulfing each other and my feet were hardly panted next to each other on the floor, and my legs were stiff still. I couldn't pay attention to anything else but the intricate designs in the faux wood. How it didn't have an obtainable pattern, it was one no one could figure out. It was created to perfection in long stride like lines, down the desk. The colors were unmistakably different shades of brown, extending from light almost pale Caucasian, to a dark thick almost black brown.

I was brought out of my trance by Ms. Dawes saying my name.

"Clare, did you hear me?" Obviously I didn't if I didn't answer you.

"Um, no Ms. Dawes sorry." She smiled and repeated the question.

"Who wrote the book we're reading?" I did know it. But something inside me didn't want to answer the question.

"I'm not sure Ms. Dawes." She looked disappointed

"Try, I'm sure you know." She was being very suggestive.

"I said, I didn't know." I was more rude than I shouldn't been, but I needed her to take the attention off of me.

"Oh, okay then, does anyone else know the answer?" I went back to tracing my desk, when before I could even recognize the bell had rung. I did my usual. I picked up my book, put it in my bag, picked up my pencil, put it in my pencil case, put the pencil case in my bag. Then come the hard part. I picked up my bag, and wrenched it over my shoulder, lifting the weight of 4 text books, and some binders, and resting it on my throbbing shoulder. Each step hurt more than the last. I felt like I just ran 10 miles, and my legs were paying the repercussions of it. I felt weak, and used. I felt like shit. More or less, I just wanted to die. I wanted every hit to be the last, I'd prefer die than be in this world any longer. This gave me my idea. I don't have to be in this world. I don't have to sit through this. I don't have to accept this as my fate. I can end my own life, and everyone would finally be at peace including myself. This thought was constantly running through my mind as I sat down at the lunch table, and was deep in thought. I heard the boys come to our table, but I was so into my own thoughts that I didn't care.

"Clare, are you getting lunch?"

"No." I said simply, still deep in thought.

"Clare, you usually eat lunch all the time, what up with you recently?" Alli asked. She was severely annoying me.

"There is nothing wrong with me Alli, I am just not hungry, now get off my back." I said, angrily, as I opened my bag, and pulled out my book I had to intentions of reading, just so I didn't stare into space.

"Clare, what are you doing for the English project?" I looked up, startled someone was talking to me.

"I said what are you doing for the English project?" Oh the English project.

"Um, honestly I probably won't do it." Alli started laughing.

"Yes you will, you always do." I rolled my eyes at her.

"No I won't."

"Well, you need to or else you won't pass." I shrugged. It's not like I will live long enough to graduate anyway.

I got up and went to the library, ignoring her calls behind me. I am so sick and tired of her bullshit. Like, so tired of it. So when I walked away I swore I was done with this. I was done with her caring. I was done with her friendship. A tear fell down my cheek at the thought but this was how it has to be if I am going to end up dead, one way or another. I don't need her around to mess with my decision. My decision to stay, or my decision to go.


End file.
